I guess it finally had to happen. After years of holding out, I finally had my very first (and last) coffee from Starbucks. When the experience was over, (over being very subjective… I drank less than a quarter of the coffee), I felt dirty and disappointed. Disappointed in myself for finally sucomming, not for the fact that the coffee was sub-standard. For years I have been very dismissive of the American coffee giant. Generally, my comments about Starbucks and its ilk generally involve a litany of profanity, but I’m making the effort to improve my langauge. Friends, namely MonekyBoy, had said that I was in no position to do so until I had tried it.

So, how did I finally end up having a coffee from Starbucks? In order to make my way through uni, I… um… volunteer… my time at a theatre in the heart of Melbourne. It was one of those cold, chilly, rainy afternoons that Melbourne is renowned for. I had a craving for coffee all afternoon, so when one of my colleagues said he was doing ‘a coffee run’, I jumped at the chance to get myself a coffee. My very first question was “where are you going”? The reply of Starbucks made me cringe. Faced with the option of herbal tea, or a Starbucks coffee, I choose the coffee. I’m was then asked what kind of coffee I want… grande, flavours… My response was “I just want a regular latte… no flavours, regular size”. I didn’t think that was to much to ask for. Anyway, a few minutes pass and Paul, my colleague at the theatre, comes back with this huge cup… (paper, cringe factor five! Knowing it would be take-away, this is a sacrifice I reluctantly accept). The cup. My God! It was bigger than a pint! It was essentially warm milk - they at least got the temperature right and I could drink it straight away. Alas it had a very faint coffee taste, and a poor one at that. My first and last Starbucks experience wasn’t a pleasant one. (Check out the experience of another consumer at Starbucks at Idle Thoughts. Very funny, with a language warning).

Growing up and living in Melbourne, I’ve been blessed with the ability to get great coffee thoughout the city. Courtesy of Melbourne’s Italian and Greek immigrants from the 1950s, Melbourne has established a cafe culture that is second to none anywhere. (Cafe culture in the European sense, not in the generic Starbucks or Gloria Jean sense). All my adult life I have embraced and made the most of this environment. I’ve become quite fussy about my coffee. I appreciate and enjoy good coffee. Coupled with this, I also… um… volunteer… at a friends cafe Melbourne’s CBD (I’m very generous aren’t I!). After a couple of years, my skills in making, and appreciation of good coffee have only increased. And with so much great coffee available to me, I should not and will not settle for second (or third) best. It is an attitude that a lot of Melburnians have taken (although try getting a good coffee in Sydney. Gooood luck!). According to Global Food And Wine Magazine:

“Starbucks has had limited success in the Australian market place”. (Number 37, 2006, p 22. Sorry, the magazine is not available online, hence the hard copy reference!)

That said, chain coffee stores account for over 40% of coffee sales in Australia, led by Michel’s Patisserie, Gloria Jeans and McCafe. I guess there’s no accounting for taste! Then again, I could be stuck in Manhatten. 169 Starbucks in a five mile (eight kilometre) radius! I guess the guys at Gawker, Kottke and Cory’s have even more time on their hands than I do!

There are alternatives, as the guys at Carpark discussed! However, if you must drink coffee from Starbucks, take the Starbucks Challange… and ask for Fair Trade Coffee when you next visit!

“There are more than 1500 flavours in coffee itself, and each contributes to the taste of an espresso. There is no reason to add flavours, unless of course, there are defects in the coffee”.
— Andrea Illy, CEO Illycaffe