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Archived Posts from “Australia”

The Importance of Manners

18

February

So, last week Kruddy said sorry.

My question is this: did anyone issue an official thank-you?


A Waitress Named “Oneness”

01

February

It’s been a while since anyone wrote a (good) post.

I guess it has been an uneventful few months:

Rudd toppled the tyrant with Mandarin, Corey Worthington impressed the world with his intelligence and good teeth, Rob Mitchell officially contests the McEwen result, two relatively unknown tennis players compete in the Australian Open final, Federer was a bad sport, free porn on your mobile phone, Heath Ledger died, Oz gave up smoking again, Britney Spears is mental, Owen Wilson attempted suicide, James Packer is a Scientologist, Nicole is pregnant, David Hicks isn’t in the news, bogans misbehave at the Big Day Out, Terry Gilliam has had another movie disaster, Obama is ahead in the polls, everyone I know is getting married, the Biggest Loser is coming back to TV and Lost is coming back for yet another season.

Also, the other night at dinner I had a waitress whose name is Oneness.

So much gold!

What a bunch of slack asses.


The AFL

06

November

I know this has become a Mac forum, but there is something else gnawing away at me, and not in a good way.

You Melbournians who read this will probably think I am a disloyal Melbourne native when you read what I have to say about the AFL.

Although born and raised in Melbourne, I have never admired the AFL or anyone associated with it besides a few standouts like Jim Stynes.

What person in their right mind would let their kids go to an Auskick session with a bunch of immature bogan criminals like the current bunch of yobbos we call footballers?

The thing that really bothers me though, is that they sometimes get caught, but rather than be made an example of, they receive light sentences, if any punishment at all.

Geelong defender David Johnson escaped conviction over a drunken scuffle with police on Grand Final eve because he is “Geelong defender David Johnson”.

Former St Kilda and Brisbane Lions footballer Steven Lawrence was FINED $5000 and AVOIDED a conviction over a drunken pub brawl. St Kilda forward Fraser Gehrig and Brownlow medallists Michael Voss and Simon Black were also involved in the bar fight and like Lawrence have also avoided conviction.

And who could forget good old Benny Cousins? He should have been forced to go to some sort of boot camp style rehab centre here. Give him to Judge Judy and see what she says. If he is allowed to play the game again, the AFL has no regard for public morals and its followers.

Normal people, actual members of society, would be (and are) dealt with far more harshly. A brownlow medal only means you can kick a pig gut in a paddock with prowess than the other Neanderthals around you. It doesn’t make you a good person.


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